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Peckles

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Everything posted by Peckles

  1. She was shaped like an hourglass, growing heavier on the bottom over time.

    1. Lookback

      Lookback

      These are the days of our lives...

    2. walkingCat

      walkingCat

      nice one, can i borrow this line?

  2. They say you're only as old as you feel. And I feel old.

    1. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      You'll always feel as smooth and fresh as a baby to me.

    2. Peckles

      Peckles

      Oh stop it, you

  3. Just found a note in my phone, and all it says is 'strangling a goose in the night' and I have no idea what it means or why it's there

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. crasx

      crasx

      pixie dust. bring me pixie dust

    3. Lookback

      Lookback

      He does live it Edmonton, could mean a lot of things - especially this time of year!

    4. Girlzilla

      Girlzilla

      I think it means we're going to have an easy winter. That's what the woolly bear said too.

  4. I shook my cat and it turned in to an oscillot

    1. Lookback

      Lookback

      Must've been just purring when that happened...

  5. Happiness is going to the fridge for your last beer only to discover you have two last beers

  6. Sometimes I regret getting a dresser when being undressed is way more fun.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      You can usually find professional undressers down on the corner for a reasonable sum I think.

    3. onyxdragoon
    4. JackieChan

      JackieChan

      Dresser, but I hardly know her!

  7. Oh good, still far enough away...
  8. Welcome to paradise*. Early September weather always throws a slice of hell at us to remind us who's in control. Then we get nice weather for a few weeks. Where did you move to? *paradise is 100% subjective
  9. Deodorant is made in olfactories

  10. When a zoologist needs to to his taxes, he consults his adder.

    1. Biggs

      Biggs

      What if he needs to multiply, subtract, or divide?

    2. Lookback

      Lookback

      He sends it to a taxonomist.

  11. If excrement is poop, increment is food

    1. Pumpernickel

      Pumpernickel

      i c what u did there.

    2. Lookback

      Lookback

      What is 'crement'?

    3. Peckles

      Peckles

      It's like cement, but you can put it on your toast

  12. Calm a llama down, calm a llama deep down in the ocean blue

    1. MPG1770

      MPG1770

      Calm a llama down ... take it to the Dalai Llama

    2. turnbullTeRRoR

      turnbullTeRRoR

      shoot a llama in its face, hey it had its chance. Stupid beast wouldn't calm down

    3. Lookback

      Lookback

      llama llama ding dong

  13. I got a tattoo of my leg on my leg. Hard to see it though.
  14. I'm very stinky. (using my pre-existing stinkiness as the initial value of not quite as stinky)

    1. MPG1770

      MPG1770

      smell ya later

  15. I'll make my OWN FragFest! With Blackjack! And..ahh, screw it.

    1. glgl

      glgl

      PeeeeeeklzzzZZzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ :)

    2. Fairweather

      Fairweather

      OoooRGllEeeeee

       

    3. turnbullTeRRoR

      turnbullTeRRoR

      No one showed up to FFF fragfestFayetteville either *sadface

  16. Don't think I would buy a pickup truck. I'm just not that flirty.

  17. Slept on my neck funny. Think I'll try sleeping on my bed tonight.

    1. Lookback

      Lookback

      When your neck is laughing you should know not to fall asleep on it.

  18. "We have this chicken. It's 6 feet tall, and it's supposed to talk, but doesn't. Could you take a look at it?" Sometimes I get asked weird questions at work...

  19. If you can think of anything more tedious than editing hours of audio related to occupational health and safety, please share it with me because I could really use the perspective

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      Being stuck in a car with your very chatty ex-wife for an 8 hour drive.

    3. Sky

      Sky

      editing hours of video related to watching the grass grow.

    4. Lookback

      Lookback

      Performing navelfuzzectomies.

  20. After trying on countless shoes, I finally found a frontrunner.

  21. I've had amnesia for as long as I can remember

  22. Cribs should be called 'childberths'

  23. Rich people are rude because someone else minds their manors

  24. I didn't go outside today. Is there weather?

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