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When everything seems to be falling apart


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I thought after the heart attack - going through all the cardio-rehab etc, life is not the same - I can't play the piano for more than 20mins or so without feeling totally breathless - I've even tried very recently doing a concert or 2, but now I have to come to the realisation - I can't do that anymore.

 

Last year before this recent health situation arose, I gave my brother my savings to get his house repaired - that didn't happen - used the money to pay off his and his wife's credot card bills and other debts - needless to say the house is still in need of repair - that's farmily for you.

 

I really can't go back into teaching - paperwork is way too much and I find using public transport is way too stressful - there is no consideration of driving myself - I hate it and it scares me - not prepared to travel between 25 - 450 miles a day to go to a gig - unless it's a major orchestral event - and I think that career has now ended.

 

Sit at home, give private music lessons - oh my no - besides who in the hell wants to send their child to some out of he way place - it's not going to happe.n.  Internet music based - that's not going to happen either - I got over 100,000 followers on a music site - sold 8 pieces - yay - I get royalties from them every year totalling almost $8

 

Need to work for the value of llife - this is what I'm going to do - I'm a composer - I want to create beauty for humanity

 

Thank you GC - thanks specifically to JC, Chick, FK, Mercman, Peanut, Crasx - even in cyberspace you have shown me there is hope for us all - thank you.

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Breaks my heart Maestro that you're going through this. When it rains it pours, that's for sure. I have faith you'll recover. Would love to hear some of your music sometime. I bet my son would love it! He loves piano (barely 3) and I'd love to get him lessons some day. He has high functioning autism and has really taken to classical music, which I absolutely love for him. It helps him to open up, so I see first hand how magical it is for folks who both create and listen. 

 

Are you still in cardio rehab? I hope your doctors can find a better regime to get you back to your normal self again soon!

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Still in cardio rehab - got another 8 weeks left - it's a killer - do enough bloody exercise taking the dog for a walk lol.

 

I wouild suggest buying several toy instruments (as he's only 3) piano, guitar, recorder, trumpet, some drums etc - let him get the feel of the instruments and find about how sounds are produced by himself - he will gravitate towards one main instrument - that will help his cognitive development.  Also, give him a stick and when you play music, help him conduct - (place teddies on a chair with instruments) simple excerises will dramatically help expanding co-ordination.  Need any further tips creating fun and games with music - just ask.

 

Take Care

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Thanks for the pointers. I didn't think about having him conduct but I bet he would like that! He has a lot of instruments now, including a kids guitar that's really tuned/adult like. He's always loved piano. My husband can play and has taken some lessons and from infancy it helped to calm him. We didn't have any lines of communication with him until he started responding to piano/lullabies and humming along while we sing. We aren't the type to force him into one thing and what has probably helped is we have had to try a million different things to see what he best responds to.

 

We are moving into a new house in couple of weeks and I cannot wait to have a space for all his music stuff, to be able to unpack and not worry about a realtor showing up to show the house so everything has to be put away and tidy. (Our house hasn't sold yet but we decided to get out and hope we don't drown in debt.) 

 

I'd like to think that the worse the cardio therapy hits you, the better it is working for you. So no slacking!  :nono:

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