Nubus November 18, 2004 Share Nubus Member November 18, 2004 >Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic???? >> >>The following is supposedly an actual question given on a >>University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one >>student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with >>colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have >>the pleasure of enjoying it as well. >> >>Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic >>(absorbs heat)? >> >>Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's >>Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed)or >>some variant. >> >>One student, however, wrote the following: >> >>First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So >>we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and >>the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely >>assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, >>no souls are leaving. >> >>As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the >>different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these >>religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you >>will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions >>and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can >>project that all souls go to Hell. >> >>With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of >>souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate >>of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in >>order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, >>the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are >>added. >> >>This gives two possibilities: >>1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which >>souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will >>increase until all Hell breaks loose. >> >>2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls >>in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell >>freezes over. >> >>So which is it? >> >>If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman >>year that, " it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, >>and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, >>then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is >>exothermic and has already >>frozen over. >> >>The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it >>follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, >>extinct...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a >>divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting >>"Oh my God." >> >>THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ak2786 November 18, 2004 Share Ak2786 Member November 18, 2004 lmao Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
All Kill3r November 18, 2004 Share All Kill3r Member November 18, 2004 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brillow_Head November 19, 2004 Share Brillow_Head Member November 19, 2004 that must be circulating in emails again, we got the same one at work last week, funny tho... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fatty November 19, 2004 Share Fatty GC Founder November 19, 2004 I'd hire him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mooney .gc November 19, 2004 Share Mooney .gc Member November 19, 2004 ahahahaa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
General J November 19, 2004 Share General J Member November 19, 2004 (edited) And this, my friends, is why a college education is so important. Edited November 19, 2004 by General J Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheBugs November 19, 2004 Share TheBugs Member November 19, 2004 ROFL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiffy November 19, 2004 Share Jiffy Member November 19, 2004 yay this is hilarious! i member this a long time ago, but it gets better every time. the ending just about sums it up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NOFX November 19, 2004 Share NOFX Member November 19, 2004 yay this is hilarious! i member this a long time ago, but it gets better every time. the ending just about sums it up <{POST_SNAPBACK}> yea jiffy I remember hambone posting it, havent seen this in a while! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xterminator November 19, 2004 Share Xterminator Member November 19, 2004 THANKYOU!!! i've been looking for this thing for years!! my english teacher in highschool read that to us one day. It was hilarious! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
huhuh? November 19, 2004 Share huhuh? Member November 19, 2004 ROLLING ON THE GROUND LAUGHING that was awesome Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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