GOrnE

Yes, the joke forum needs more publicity! Help out and read a joke today.

Linky What happened to the good ole days of lemonade stands and such?

Personally, I liked "The Ring" better than ringu, but as for the grudge.. Yeah, ju-on was about 100x creepier. I saw the japanese version of the pulse and well..kinda disappointed. But am going to see pulse today soo...

It's your birthday!!! Have a good one.

Oldie, but a goodie. We should do a blonde joke week. Come on hackie, we can do it!

Bah.. You're just mad I posted mine first. =P

I've always hated the styling of any camero past 1969. This one is no different. They claim retro styling, but I disagree. Always loved the trans am's though. I know, I know, it's the same car. But I always loved how they looked. They should bring back the trans am instead. Now the new Challenger is going to be where it's at!

An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finished all three, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender says to him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time." The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days we all drank together." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there. The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar and always drinks the same way: he orders three pints and drinks the three pints by taking drinks from each of them in turn. One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars in the bar notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss." The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no," he says, "Everyone is fine. I've just quit drinking!"

Might as well.. Happy Birthday!11!!!

Ha! Found the thread kwix. Not quite sure what theme I wanted at first, but.. here goes nothing. 1. GOrnE 2. Black and red 3. A religious theme. Basically all I want is a cross in it somewhere. Being the very creative and artistic person that I am, that's all I can come up with at the moment. Everything else I leave up to you. I'm sure I'll like whatever you do kwix. Btw, I might hit you up for a clan spray soon, if it wouldn't be too much trouble.

A false birthday thread?! To death with the maker!

If you're planning to go for it again, let me know if I'm on clash. I'll stay with you as long as I can.

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman." EDIT: w00t, 200th post! Now I'm first class :-D

"LOL" STEAM_0:0:1402300 01:21 61 0 active "[=D] admin" STEAM_0:0:5013930 05:44 47 0 active spamming on the mic and tking some other idiot with the [=P] tag was in but couldnt get his steam id

Lmao, didn't see that punchline coming.

Why won't you DIE GOCI?!?! *looks at own tag* *realizes how many goci members there are* *runs and hides*

Fixed it for you. Happy bday both of ya. Have a good one!

A sailor and a priest were playing golf. The sailor took his first shot missed and said, "****, I missed." Surprised, the priest replied, "Don’t use that kind of language or God will punish you." The sailor took aim and hit his shot second shot. Again he missed and under his breath the said, "I ****’n missed again." The priest overheard and replied, "My son, please don’t use that language or God will punish you." The sailor took his third shot and once again he couldn’t help mutter, "Oh ****…" The priest said, "That’s it God will certainly punish you." Suddenly a bolt of lightning came down and killed the priest. In the distance a deep voice said, "****, I Missed".

I agree. Train is an awesome map and I'd love to see it in the final rotation.

And they say stupid doesn't hurt...

Full throttle is by far the worst tasting imo. In order of taste, I say monster is #1. And after awhile, the effects start wearing off but you'll get a decent boost if you use it once in a while I find.

happy birthday!

Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together, discussing how important their children are. The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him "Father." The second Catholic woman chirps, "Well, my son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace.'" The third Catholic woman says smugly, "Well, not to put you down, but my son is a cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say 'Your Eminence." The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence. The first three women give her this subtle "Well...?" She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6'2," hard bodied, well hung, male stripper. Whenever he walks into a room, women say, "My God.."

You'd think these wouldn't be real domain names... 1. Who Represents? a database for agencies to the rich and famous: http://www.whorepresents.com 2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base for programmers: http://www.expertsexchange.com 3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island: http://www.penisland.net 4. Need a therapist? http://www.therapistfinder.com 5. Mole Station Native Nursery: http://www.molestationnursery.com

Why men can't win... If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum. If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity. If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it's male indifference. If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive. If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman. If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination. If she asks you, it's a favor. If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain. If you don't, you're a slob. If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful. If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist. If you're not, you're not ambitious. If she has a headache, she's tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore