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Peckles

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Status Updates posted by Peckles

  1. Peckles

    If I were a photographer, I'd take pictures in Cardiff and market them as Prints of Wales.

    1. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      You need a new hobby

  2. Peckles

    If I were to make a laundry detergent that was especially good at protecting colours, I would call it Martin Lather King Jr.

    1. VooDooPC

      VooDooPC

      Too soon!

    2. JackieChan

      JackieChan

      22.3 years

  3. Peckles

    If somebody could walk on my spine, that'd be great.

    1. Show previous comments  7 more
    2. TheDude

      TheDude

      I'll take the first shift of jumping on talpa's back. Can i bring my studded shoes?

    3. Peckles

      Peckles

      All my shoes become studded as soon as I put them on

    4. MasterTalpa

      MasterTalpa

      bring it

  4. Peckles

    If you can think of anything more tedious than editing hours of audio related to occupational health and safety, please share it with me because I could really use the perspective

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      Being stuck in a car with your very chatty ex-wife for an 8 hour drive.

    3. Sky

      Sky

      editing hours of video related to watching the grass grow.

    4. Lookback

      Lookback

      Performing navelfuzzectomies.

  5. Peckles

    If you don't behave, I'm giving your ice cream to the dog. The ice cream is recoverable, but you'd have to eat the dog too, and you're not getting a new dog.

  6. Peckles

    If you don't like these pebbles, we can find you some alternative rock.

    1. lousiest

      lousiest

      hehe :)

  7. Peckles

    If you haven't heard of double entendres, I'd be happy to fill you in

    1. tainted92

      tainted92

      A woman walked into a library and asked the receptionist if he could find the book on innuendos. After searching for it on his computer, he took her in the back and let her have it.

  8. Peckles

    If you wanna find out what's behind these cold eyes, you'll just have to claw your way through this disguise

  9. Peckles

    If you're alone today, just remember that nobody loves you any other day of the year either <3

  10. Peckles

    If you're looking for the quickest way to achieve a thigh gap, it's no more complicated than chopping off one of your legs

    1. Jerkoff

      Jerkoff

      Man, those one-legged people must have it good then!

    2. Fairweather

      Fairweather

      do pickles have legs?

       

  11. Peckles

    In Canada, it's 'Hodour'.

    1. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      .......

    2. Lookback

      Lookback

      Does not look like Canada

       

  12. Peckles

    Is it weird that whenever I say the word 'flesh' I feel like a zombie and/or leper?

  13. Peckles

    It just occurred to me that Uranus is a gas giant.

    1. lousiest

      lousiest

      LOL

    2. Hailfire

      Hailfire

      Its funny cause its true.

  14. Peckles

    It said 'scotch' on the label, but I swear it tasted like tape

    1. turnbullTeRRoR

      turnbullTeRRoR

      Had a similar problem with a product marked Duck here a while back

  15. Peckles

    It's -45 with the windchill today...ughhhhhh

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Biggs

      Biggs

      -45 K sure is cold

    3. Peckles

      Peckles

      Yeah, absolute zero's got nothing on this.

    4. boiler

      boiler

      What, no pithy pun? Has the cold temporarily robbed you of your creativity?

  16. Peckles

    It's no use, Mr. James. It's turtles all the way down.

  17. Peckles

    It's pretty depressing to realize that your job is basically to enable jerks to instruct other jerks how to more efficiently be jerks

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. Peckles

      Peckles

      I'm an audio tech, so I give people peddling self-important crap the ability to say it louder with a wider area of effect

    3. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      Have you made any new music lately?

    4. Peckles

      Peckles

      Not for awhile...What would you like a song to be about, shaft?

  18. Peckles

    Just found a note in my phone, and all it says is 'strangling a goose in the night' and I have no idea what it means or why it's there

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. crasx

      crasx

      pixie dust. bring me pixie dust

    3. Lookback

      Lookback

      He does live it Edmonton, could mean a lot of things - especially this time of year!

    4. Girlzilla

      Girlzilla

      I think it means we're going to have an easy winter. That's what the woolly bear said too.

  19. Peckles

    Leftovers: A great way to not waste food and be lazy at the same time

    1. Lookback

      Lookback

      Especially if you live in a place where you can store them outside all winter (and most of the spring and fall)

  20. Peckles

    Losin' weight. (read: poopin')

    1. LadyYuri

      LadyYuri

      i did that 2 times today

  21. Peckles

    Made milkshakes. Brought boys to the yard. Shunned for lechery.

  22. Peckles

    Mammograms are apparently not similar to candygrams.

    1. Lookback

      Lookback

      Good Lord, what id you ask for in the mail?

  23. Peckles

    Maybe I'll sit outside all day today. Like a dog. Or a mailbox.

    1. Biggs

      Biggs

      Sometimes it's good to be outside the box

  24. Peckles

    Maybe Oscar Pistorius just got cold feet...

    1. TheDude

      TheDude

      That's crossing the line within record time

    2. Cinkadeus

      Cinkadeus

      Too soon?

  25. Peckles

    Merecats are quite humble.

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. boiler

      boiler

      Eh, I give this joke 2 Peklz out of 5 Peklz. Not your best work, but everyone has an off day.

    3. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      Wait.. there are more than 1 Peckles out there?!

    4. boiler

      boiler

      No, it's just the Peklz rating system, PRS if you will.

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