shaftiel October 27, 2008 Share shaftiel Member October 27, 2008 So, my wife came over to me and sat down, looked at me and said, "Are you going to keep the house when I move out?" I looked at her blankly for a minute and said, "Um... what?". Seems that she feels I have never cared for her like she deserves. So after 12 years of marriage and 3 kids she wants a divorce. Sigh. It seems her friends have known for over a year that she was unhappy, but nobody, including my wife, thought it would be useful to let me in on the situation. I mean, yes, she lost her mother last year, and she has been on anti-depressants for years now, but I had no idea that she felt I was a problem. Oh well, she has made up her mind I suppose. I asked her to at least go to a few counseling sessions with me to try and figure things out before we file. I'm afraid I will be a little lost if this goes through and we get a divorce. She was my second girlfriend, and the only one I have ever had relations with. I guess I just let my personal stress regarding my job get in the way of our relationship. Just wish she had told me about it before now. Anyway, hopefully we can get to the root of the problem during the counseling and work this out. Wish me luck. Shaftiel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shazz October 27, 2008 Share Shazz Member October 27, 2008 The heartache is heavy for sure.. I am happy she will go to counseling, that will help you both out at the moment. I will be keeping you in my prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stutters October 27, 2008 Share stutters GC Alumni October 27, 2008 I hope she takes you up on the counseling sessions, for your sake, and the kids' sake. ...You did offer to pay for the sessions, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dwEEziL October 27, 2008 Share dwEEziL Member October 27, 2008 That sucks man. I've been there before and wish it on no one. You and your family are in my prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boiler October 28, 2008 Share boiler Member October 28, 2008 Good luck Shaft, hope she agrees to the counseling and you both go into it with open minds and a desire to make it work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Playaa October 28, 2008 Share Playaa Member October 28, 2008 hopefully we can get to the root of the problem The root of the problem = miscommunication. Seems pretty obvious to me. Seems like you need to find out every feeling she has about your relationship and examine yourself honestly to figure out where you went wrong. NEVER go into a situation like this trying to figure out what the other person did wrong. ALWAYS try to figure out what you did wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magruter October 28, 2008 Share Magruter Member October 28, 2008 dang that sucks... I have a buddy going through the same situation right now, unhappy wife she never said a word. She hoped the problem would fix itself, according to her it never did. Now she's just messing with him and not filing for divorce. I think she's waiting for him to file so she doesn't feel like the bad guy. My prayers go out to you and your kids, you need to try counseling, NEED! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Preacher October 28, 2008 Share Preacher Member October 28, 2008 Well if she agrees to the counseling then I would have to say she isn't 100% sure of the break-up. I would sincerely consider watching the movie Fireproof together. I know it's a bit cheesy, but it would really help the two of you understand how love works. When you put the other person first, in all things, you open the door for them to wish to do the same. A movie, however, will not solve 12 years of not being who you guys should have been. Counseling is a great first step. I can also outline some stuff for you guys if you are not financially secure enough to pay a decent counselor. PM Sent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragonfly October 29, 2008 Share dragonfly Member October 29, 2008 Dude, that sucks. I hope you beat this thing and come out with a relationship stronger than ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eXile November 3, 2008 Share eXile Member November 3, 2008 not to be too nosy but hows this goin shaft? any good news? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shaftiel November 3, 2008 Author Share shaftiel Member November 3, 2008 not to be too nosy but hows this goin shaft? any good news? Well enough, we are laughing again, and I am making it a point to spend more time with her just talking. So I am hopeful that things can turn around. Thanks for asking Shaftiel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragonfly November 3, 2008 Share dragonfly Member November 3, 2008 That's great! I love laughing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brew November 4, 2008 Share Brew Member November 4, 2008 i hope things work out for the best shaft... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracid November 4, 2008 Share Tracid Member November 4, 2008 That sucks Shaft, I hope all will go well. On a side note why is it women think men can read their mind and mood like a psychic? We're certainly not Professor X here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eXile November 4, 2008 Share eXile Member November 4, 2008 good to hear things are turning around. hopefully it stays that way. GL bro, in my prayers for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoveForPriscillaChan November 10, 2008 Share LoveForPriscillaChan Member November 10, 2008 Good Luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now