I need your Prayers

[MrDuke]

TY Rev. We couldn't do it without the support.

[MrDuke]

Update:

Danielle got her counts drawn and she's doing well. She's recovering from the cold & croup, we just hope it's in time for Christmas.

 

Thank you to all for your thoughts and prayers. I tell everyone that tells me they pray for my child that I truly believe it's the prayers and faith in God that allows her to survive.

I frequently tell God that I know I will see my daughter if he takes her and that if He could see it in his heart to let me keep her here with me because I know that fact (am I rambling?). Maybe I'm rationalizing, or negotiating or just coming up with another coping mechanism..dunno.

I just pray He lets us keep her here, with us. I know that's selfish but I don't care.

 

Remember the real reason for Christmas. Put it in perspective and incorporate it into your own life. Express your thanks for the gift, not just on Christmas, but every day.

 

Charge the batteries to take lots of pics of the little ones. Try to watch them and take joy in their joy. Hug 'em up.

 

Peace be with you all,

Duke

[MrDuke]

Update #2:

 

I'm very,very angry. Kel just informed me of a terrible incident regarding her support group. After hearing about it all I wanted to do was let the GC computer wizards loose to show this person how difficult life can really be.

 

I'll give you the links, you can draw your own opinions from them.

 

Her cancer blog, used to update everyone on her fight for life.

 

Her personal blog. Pay attention to the dates.

 

Long story short this person is a fraud. She doesn't have cancer, she's not suffering, nothing. She gained the trust of mothers who have children with cancer, mothers who have buried their children and mothers who lean on each other to keep their sanity. She caused a great deal of pain and anguish.

Part of me prays that she receive forgiveness and part of me wishes she would suffer (hence the desire for our geniuses to make it so).

 

There are a lot of mom's hurting by this betrayal right now. I don't really expect a lot of you to understand the hurt that this woman created. I've learned that unless you are knee deep in it, you will never truly understand the daily struggles that cancer causes(and it's good that you don't know). But these moms have enough hurt on their plates as it is, they don't need any more.

 

I'm not really asking people to make her life difficult, I'm just venting. But the thought of Fatty and his 300 phone calls a day situation comes to mind.

 

 

Grrrr. Give me 2 minutes w/ a lead pipe, that's all I'm askin for. I'll show her suffering...

[Preacher]

I think David went through something similar lol

 

9 Let my enemies be destroyed

by the very evil they have planned for me.

10 Let burning coals fall down on their heads,

or throw them into the fire,

or into deep pits from which they can’t escape.

11 Don’t let liars prosper here in our land.

Cause disaster to fall with great force on the violent.

12 But I know the Lord will surely help those they persecute;

he will maintain the rights of the poor.

13 Surely the godly are praising your name,

for they will live in your presence.

 

Holy Bible : New Living Translation. 1997 (Ps 140:9-13). Wheaton, Ill.: Tyndale House.

[MrDuke]

TY Preach.

 

Update:

 

Christmas went well and we were able to see almost everyone in the family. Santa brought too much stuff to our house, depending on who you ask.

 

Danielle is doing very well. The latest crisis is over (I think) and things seem to be settling down.

Currently, my only concern is my b-i-l. He had a 101 fever last night (and Danielle was with him most of Saturday). I know he didn't intentionally disregard the 'illness rule' and I know he is VERY worried about Danielle getting it. Hopefully, whatever bug he got, he got after he visited with us. I pray it's not the flu or we're in big trouble.

The next 3 days will tell. However, my gut tells me we don't have to worry.

 

That's a funny thing. What does 'what's your gut say?' really mean? I've found that it doesn't mean 'I hope it'll go this way', or 'I think it'll go this way'. When I really think about a question or a situation, an inner voice (not loud, but firm) says, 'THIS is the way'. Sometimes I like the answer, sometimes I don't.

Personally, I feel it's the holy spirit and I've just recently discovered this. I mean, it's always been there but I've never put 2 and 2 together. Anyhow, I'm not getting any bad vibes about this situation. I mean I SHOULD be concerned, but everything inside me is just saying 'relax'.

 

The fraudulent girl incident seems to be passing. I think it was therapeutic. If you'll recall, cancer parents harbor a lot of anger and rage and it has nowhere to go. I think this girl unknowingly helped a lot of parents vent a lot of anger. Wrong reasons, right outcome.

I hope she is forgiven by all.

 

Did anyone watch their kids discover the 1/2 eaten cookie? Did you really watch your kids? Danielle's eyes got really, really big-- you could just see the wheels turning, turning...wait for it...waaaait for it....

"Daddy!!! Santa was here!!!!" (you get the idea). It doesn't have to be just Christmas. Just watch your kids any day. Take a moment and smile along with them, just as He watches and smiles over you. Smiles are precious.

 

If you don't already do this, feel free to try it. When I leave for work or get home from work, we do 'biggest,biggest,biggest,biggest hugs'. That's where they run to the other side of the house and then run back to you and jump into your arms. When they jump, let out a big "Ummph" and then spin them around. A good day doesn't officially start until you get the biggest,biggest,biggest,biggest hugs.

 

P.S. Unless you like bloody noses, respectfully decline when the wife asks if she can give you biggest,biggest,biggest,biggest hugs.

[ConGregation]

Thanks for the updat, Duke. We will continue to pray.

 

My kids love to set me on the edge of my bed then backtrack as far as they can go. Then get a full head of steam and knock me into next week.

 

It's getting dangerous. My daughter still loves to do this and she will be 12 in two months. I've learned to watch for the knees!

[Preacher]

Yes 12 year old girl knees are deadly to fathers. Also if you have a 240lb dog close the door before playing rough with the kids cuz he likes to play too and his paws in the crotch are just, well lets just say "unpleasant", I am currently going for the all time worlds longest fantastic run-on sentence because "I have a feeling" (not to be confused with the Holy Spirits prompting) that my 5th grade English teacher will read this and I'm hoping she craps her pants and passes out after she has completed reading this awesome array of catostrophic articulation .

Edited December 28, 2005 by Preacher

[MrDuke]

I was just going to write that everything was looking good and 2006 should be an easier year than 2005.

 

Well, on the 3rd Kel was sent to Labor & Delivery 13 weeks early . We discovered that she and the baby are ok, but they have no idea why she's having the problems that she has.

 

Tonight is Danielle's turn. The fever was at 102.6, last we checked. Kel just wisked her off to the hospital and I'm @ home watching Nukem until morning. Dunno what happens later this morning. I'm really getting tired of the drama.

 

Anyhow, I can't sleep so I thought I'd post up.

 

More as I get it.

 

I'm asking for your help, please pray.

[ConGregation]

Done and doing.

 

I can imagine that the constant struggle can be weary-ing. I know I would have a hard time not dieing inside, a bit. It's like standing on a high ledge, at first it makes your toes tingle but after awhile it's just like standing anywhere else. Your senses coulnd't handle the constant intensity. For me that would be my response. The emotional strain would cause me to withdraw. To become 'numb' emotionally.

 

But that is me, it's not super dad like you!

 

I guess I would have to let God carry that emotional load so in turn I wouldn't 'die' from the emotional pressure.

 

It's official... I CAN'T put myself in your shoes... in even the tiniest way! I am praying for you, Kel, Danielle, and Nukem!

[Preacher]

Tylonon PM is a wonderful thing for those in high stress living environments, just not too often or you'll get ddependant and won't be able to sleep without it.

 

Praying for ya bro

[MrDuke]

Update:

 

Danielle's fever is gone, her pressure is up and her pulse is down. She is in a good mood.

Her ANC shot up to 5200 yesterday and plummeted to 300 today.

Cultures have not grown anything yet.

 

So, she should be home tonight! I think it's safe to say we dodged another bullet.

 

Fingers are crossed!

[Bubblegum Bandit]

 

Buckets O Smiles for everyone!!!!

[MrDuke]

Something happened which resulted in her staying longer.

 

Nothing serious as of yet, it just means I eat dinner at the hospital.

[MrDuke]

She's home.

[becca48]

Really glad to here that she is home.

[Ice_Berge_00]

great news!!

[Preacher]

Update? How are you doing old man?

 

Hope you didn't fall and break your hip or anything. One word for you "Geritol" lol

[MrDuke]

Update:

 

She's doing ok, overall. She complains of pain in her bones but that's the worst of it.

So far, so good.

 

I'm teaching her how to stalk her prey, much like a lion teaches the cubs. I figured I better have a backup plan in case Mag has me thrown in jail.

 

I'd rather break a hip than go on a vacation w/ my mother in law. A vacation with your mother in law is not really a vacation, now is it?

Hope it was fun, post some pics.

[TheGeek]

Dude my prayers are with you

-Your brother in Christ

[MrDuke]

Thank you, Geek.

 

Update:

 

Danielle decided to pull the blanket out from under my son's feet in a fit of selfishness.

Oh, hi Mr. Coffee table!! Meet Mr. Nukem's face!!

Nukem got stitches to close the hole in his chin where his teeth came through.

 

Looking back it's just an accident and a trivial one at that. But for some reason I wouldn't let it go and continued to force the point that her selfishness and inconsiderate behavior hurt someone. I could see that she was upset and crying, but I still drilled it home... to a 4 year old.

So with a large cup of coffee (and guilt) I'm at work this morning replaying everything in my head. I'm really focusing on the 'selfishness and inconsiderate' part of things and I get to thinking... Is that why God tells us not to be selfish or inconsiderate? Because it hurts others? I mean, now I can see the tangible results of selfishness.

With a bit of role playing I thought about it again:

I can see my kids horsing around and I can see Nukem standing on the blanket. I am aware of the risk of an injury; the thought pops into my head but I do not say anything. Danielle pulls the blanket in a fit of selfishness. Nukem loses his balance and kisses the coffeetable. The hurt ensues.

Is this how God sees it? Am I Danielle, unaware of the risk and still making poor choices in life? Is God in my role watching everything play out, knowing there is danger but letting me learn on my own? Is there an unknown person out there playing Nukem's role, just a victim in all of the madness?

It's heavy,heavy stuff. So much so that I need another cup of coffee.

 

I haven't said it in a while... go snuggle with your kids. This morning Danielle's curls were tickling my nose and I loved every second of it. Embrace those few seconds.

 

P.S. Tonight were having noodles, mashed potatoes and yogurt for dinner since Nukem can't eat hard foods. Yum.

[pavid]

Duke, from my point of view Danielle was just being a kid. Kids learn by doing. They don't often think of the consequences. Will she do it again? I doubt it. She learned that what she did was wrong and that's a good thing. She saw the consequences of her actions. In the future, she may just be tempted to think first before acting. It's also good she's just being a kid.

 

Nukem now knows the dangers of coffee tables and blankets. Sometimes it's tough being a kid. Next time he just might give that mean old table a wider berth.

 

As for you. You were just being a parent. Don't be so hard on yourself. You are not Superman. I'd be willing to bet every parent has gone a little crazy at some point. As with Danielle, you learn by doing. Unlike Danielle, you get the point of the lesson much more quickly. Next time you won't be so quick off the mark.

 

What do I see in your post. A Father and his children playing normally, having fun normally, and, as sometimes is the case, having an accident normally. My point is that that type of incident is a normal part of life. And considering all that you and your wife and Danielle have gone through, that is a mighty good thing!! I'm gladdened to see your family dealing with normal things for a change.

 

How does God see what happened? With a smile, His children are being normal kids and that's a good thing!!

[wayfarer]

You know Duke, if you re-read your post you'll see what you

wrote. It sounded like the typical everyday struggles of normal

children, and typical everyday reactions/afterthoughts of a father.

I pray every night for it to be like this for you, & continue to do so!

Through your entire post you sound happy. My heart shines because

of that!

[Preacher]

Wayfarer you sound like the emotional guy in the drum circle lol <3

 

Glad things are as normal as they get for a family man. I did have a good time and will be posting my vacation pics on my families website this week some time and then I'll link you. Oh and it was my mom not the mother-in-law. You freaking kidding me I'ld rather run naked through a waste high cactus field and then swim through salt water than take that evil hound of hell with me! Yeah we don't get along so well lol.

[ephemeral]

hey duke, ther ehight already be one that i missed, but put up a pic of your daughter.

[wayfarer]

Hope I'm not stepping on your toes there Duke!! Here's one from FF05

Also I believe there are some on the site you get directed to if you

click on "a hat for Danielle" in Mr Dukes signature.

 

Wayfarer you sound like the emotional guy in the drum circle lol <3

LOL!! Well I'm sure I speak for all of us Preacher when I say, when

it comes to this thread I feel like the "boy in the bubble"