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Peckles

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Status Updates posted by Peckles

  1. Peckles

    I'm wearing funderpants.

    1. Cinkadeus

      Cinkadeus

      I only wear mine in my fungeon.

    2. yErMoTH3r

      yErMoTH3r

      Get JC outa there...

    3. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      At least he will be fundamentally supported

  2. Peckles

    I'm so tired I can't even think of puns... See??

    1. Biggs

      Biggs

      Nope, don't believe it

    2. Girlzilla

      Girlzilla

      Get up off your bun and make a pun!

    3. Peckles

      Peckles

      I'm not on a bun, but I am...in...bread....

  3. Peckles

    I was fixing a speaker in one of the barns at work, and the horse next to me pooped, licked its leavings, licked my ladder, then stared at me. Horses are jerks.

    1. BrohamMC

      BrohamMC

      LOLZ thats fuuunny! he might not be a horse he could be a jackass

       

    2. BrohamMC

      BrohamMC

      just a thought

       

    3. Jibbajabba

      Jibbajabba

      He just wanted to let you know he disapproved of you climbing the corporate ladder peklz.

  4. Peckles

    Tonight I found out to my cost that it is apparently not very romantic to compare one's partner's nose to the husk of a long-dead Goomba.

    1. BrohamMC

      BrohamMC

      did you seriously?...

    2. boiler

      boiler

      I am 100% certain he did.

    3. BrohamMC

      BrohamMC

      *slaps peckles in the face

  5. Peckles

    I just soiled myself. Soon I will be a beautiful garden.

    1. LadyYuri

      LadyYuri

      lawl thanks for the laughs

    2. turnbullTeRRoR

      turnbullTeRRoR

      Don't wanna know how you got that green thumb

    3. BrohamMC

      BrohamMC

      lol

       

  6. Peckles

    Everytime I get mints from a restaurant, I keep them as mementhos.

    1. crasx

      crasx

      the freshmaker

    2. TheDude

      TheDude

      Isn't Mementhos the movie in which Guy Pearce plays a mint with amnesia?

    3. PeanutButterNJelly

      PeanutButterNJelly

      Momento, that's a good movie!

  7. Peckles

    Welcome to the Sar Chasm. We're sooo glad you're here.

    1. Lookback

      Lookback

      We're soooo happy that you are.

    2. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      I always wait with bated breath for your next incredibly witty and smart tidbit. Wow, so not disappointed at all.

    3. Peckles

      Peckles

      Shaft, you're my faaaavourite.

  8. Peckles

    I'll make my OWN FragFest! With Blackjack! And..ahh, screw it.

    1. glgl

      glgl

      PeeeeeeklzzzZZzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ :)

    2. Fairweather

      Fairweather

      OoooRGllEeeeee

       

    3. turnbullTeRRoR

      turnbullTeRRoR

      No one showed up to FFF fragfestFayetteville either *sadface

  9. Peckles

    Calm a llama down, calm a llama deep down in the ocean blue

    1. MPG1770

      MPG1770

      Calm a llama down ... take it to the Dalai Llama

    2. turnbullTeRRoR

      turnbullTeRRoR

      shoot a llama in its face, hey it had its chance. Stupid beast wouldn't calm down

    3. Lookback

      Lookback

      llama llama ding dong

  10. Peckles

    If excrement is poop, increment is food

    1. Pumpernickel

      Pumpernickel

      i c what u did there.

    2. Lookback

      Lookback

      What is 'crement'?

    3. Peckles

      Peckles

      It's like cement, but you can put it on your toast

  11. Peckles

    Not all food makes me fart, just the ones I eat

    1. scubiedoobie

      scubiedoobie

      in other news: humans breathe oxygen

    2. Jerkoff

      Jerkoff

      Is been also noted that 100% of humans who drank water will died eventually.

    3. shaftiel

      shaftiel

      I have a fear that one day, all the uneaten food will coalesce into a giant food monster and wipe out the human race. I am just doing my part to stop it. And maybe your part as well....

  12. Peckles

    My wife asked what I would do without her, and I said I'd get to park in the garage

    1. turnbullTeRRoR

      turnbullTeRRoR

      how about you re-parktake in rust?

    2. PeanutButterNJelly

      PeanutButterNJelly

      I recently was debating if it was worth staying married. Once I realized I would have to do my own laundry, I decided it was worth the hassle.

    3. JackieChan

      JackieChan

      Yeah, laundry sucks.

  13. Peckles

    Oh, hello. Didn't see you come in. I am not sorry I'm naked. You probably are though.

    1. stutters

      stutters

      how do you know?

    2. Peckles

      Peckles

      Previous experience. You can trust me.

  14. Peckles

    If I were to make a laundry detergent that was especially good at protecting colours, I would call it Martin Lather King Jr.

    1. VooDooPC

      VooDooPC

      Too soon!

    2. JackieChan

      JackieChan

      22.3 years

  15. Peckles

    The sound you are about to hear is my head hitting a very solid desk.

    1. Flitterkill

      Flitterkill

      Sounded like a glass shattering on the floor...

    2. Peckles

      Peckles

      I had to clear the desk off first. I don't wanna hurt myself, duh.

  16. Peckles

    Vote for me! I threw a brick at a swan!

    1. RadioKnight

      RadioKnight

      Throw a brick at a goose and you have my vote.

    2. Peckles

      Peckles

      Deal! brb

  17. Peckles

    The worst thing I've ever done at a funeral was the widow.

    1. lousiest

      lousiest

      LMAO

    2. anonymo

      anonymo

      A funeral with two stiffs?

  18. Peckles

    I am a jolly pig, and I find many trofls.

    1. Hailfire

      Hailfire

      mmmmm bacon

    2. Fairweather

      Fairweather

      everyday im troffling

  19. Peckles

    My doctor told me to lose weight, so I dumped my girlfriend.

    1. Cake

      Cake

      lol ouch

    2. Gunns

      Gunns

      What was his name?

  20. Peckles

    I put the Lydian on the Aeolian Ionian, put it in the Phrygian and Locrian'd the Dorian.

    1. Biggs

      Biggs

      Did you at least throw some chanting in there?

    2. yErMoTH3r

      yErMoTH3r

      yea wheres the video...

  21. Peckles

    I saw a cloud with a crown. Must be reigning.

    1. Cake

      Cake

      *like

    2. Fairweather

      Fairweather

      pickles*

       

  22. Peckles

    I can't wait until tomorrow evening where 99% of the beer I buy will occupy all of my stomach, thus having a far greater impact than 99% of any other occupy garbage. #occupymybelly

    1. Fairweather

      Fairweather

      i like the sounds of this

       

    2. Madvillain

      Madvillain

      I am suddenly more interested in the occupy movement.

  23. Peckles

    A man died after choking on a raisin. You might say...*sunglasses* he was a victim of grape.

    1. Cinkadeus

      Cinkadeus

      YEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!

    2. boiler

      boiler

      I'm David Caruso, and I approv....*BOOMHEADSHOT*

  24. Peckles

    I used to be a birdwatcher like you, then I took a sparrow to the knee.

    1. onyxdragoon

      onyxdragoon

      No.

    2. JackieChan

      JackieChan

      I used to laugh at arrow in the knee jokes, then I took an over-saturated joke to the sense of humor.

  25. Peckles

    You have to watch out for dyslexics holding gnus.

    1. lousiest

      lousiest

      cause they might accidentally shoot themselves?

    2. samurai nightling

      samurai nightling

      No, they might say "Sky for the reach!"

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